28 May 2004

Here's something I've been waiting for!!

Please, PLEASE don't suck ass!!

I don't know about the whole Andy Kaufman thing... on the one hand, why would he reveal himself through a blog? The greatest prank of all-time should be revealed on a national stage, like on Conan O'Brien or between episodes of American Idol. Then again, anything "conventional" doesn't apply to Mr. Kaufman, so in a way it makes perfect sense. I don't know, I'm just waiting for Tupac Shakur to tell everyone he faked his death, and was really the new, thinner Missy Elliott. And the old, heavy Missy Elliott is really Ja Rule... and the real Ja Rule is dead. Very, very dead.

yeah, man. my plecko poos all the time. it comes out in ropes and gets tangled in my trees so i gotta change/clean my filter every week or so.
my plecko's a champ though. i bought two of them when i first got my tank. it was a really small tank too, i think like 3 litres. so yeah, i named them No Name 1 and No Name 2. i saluted No Name 1 into the toilet maybe a couple months later. i was pretty sad that i only had one suckerdude left. next thing i know, i see my survivor suckin on the glass and theres a crazy burn on his chest. proportional to the human torso, it would span a big circle in the area between your nipples and your belly button. it turns out he took a liking to feeding off my tank heater. i was seeing his innards like he had a window on his belly. i thought he was a for sure goner, but id wake up everyday surprised to see him still going on strong. the wound has healed and No Name 2 has a faint battle scar on his body which is now the length of my entire hand. he's my favorite fish, except for the poo factor.

25 May 2004

Andy Kaufman is back baby!



This guy says he is Andy and that he faked his own death and returned 20 years later...just like he said he would back in the day.

Is he the real deal...I sure hope so. Something like this would be CRAZY. And who knows, maybe Elvis, JFK and Marilyn are together on some island hanging with the Aliens.

18 May 2004

How about those Lakers!?!?

17 May 2004

I found a picture of two of the fish I own:

They're called Cobalt Blue Zebras, and they're pretty sweet. They're super aggressive, though, and the big one keeps chasing the little one around. Luckily, the small one is pretty fast, and the big one is REALLY FUCKING DUMB. The small one will just go through a hole in the rocks, and then the big one can't fit, and will spend like five minutes looking for the small one, who hasn't moved at all.

Wes, what kind of fish do you have in your tank? And do your plecos poo up a storm, or is it just because there's so much algae in my tank, and he's feasting?

Tell us a tale of your tank, and then I'll tell you all about mine! I'm totally geeking over this fish thing... I may be buying a little 10 gallon tank just as a hospital tank in case any of my fish get sick.

I knew you'd like that binary joke...

You know, every time you leave town on a trip, you should regale us at this site of a story from the road. Like the time you were so bored you videotaped yourself taking a bath, and somehow had no nudity throughout the course of the video... or so we're led to believe.

well, well, well. what do we have here? this place is looking pretty snazzy. i have a plan to frequent the salad more often since i now have a portal to the internet in my sleeping quarters.

im going to be completely honest with you. i thought that joke you wrote down there about the 10 types of people was hilarious. i read it three times and the whole time i was shaking my head, and whisper-laughing out of my nose.

this whole new interface thing is kinda neat too eh? the profile thing is cool and that random question thing is something i havent seen before. as much as i hate to quote two pop culture icons at the same time, i gotta say that im lovin it. bada bap bap ba.

but i'll be missing in action till thursday though because im off to beautiful grand rapids, manitoba for work. three motel nights of guitar tablature training and late-night tv.

16 May 2004

Wow, who knew that when I picked up Digital Cable that the two channels I'll have watched the most after two weeks would be Tech TV and Showcase Diva. Okay, so Showcase Diva is only because I happen to catch it every time they're showing Degrassi High, but Tech TV? I've never seen so many women who were both supremely dorky and frustratingly hot at the same time. That Morgan from X-Play? Man, that's the stangest combination of dorky and hot since I bought that Upper Deck Scottie Pippen/Jenna Von Oy card for two bucks from Cancentral.

Okay, if I didn't need a reminder as to why the NBA, which was once my supreme favorite sport, has fallen behind the NFL, CFL, NHL, WWE, CIS, IIHF, and MHSAA in terms of spectator sports, I've gotten a stark fucking reminder over the last three days. As far as I know, and as far as I've heard, and read, and been told by Bill Walton himself, you need AT LEAST 0.7 seconds to be able to catch and shoot. You also need at least 0.3 seconds just to tip the ball in. But apparantly, if you're the LA Lakers, you can have 0.4 seconds to catch and shoot to win the game. Fine, I'll live with that, if that's the worst that it can get...

But then watching game six, I left in disgust after two and a half quarters. It's bad enough that Kobe Bryant travels EVERY fucking time he penetrates. It's bad enough that if Karl Malone whines, he gets a technical, but if he whines EVEN MORE, the ref will change it to a double technical with Malone and Tim Duncan. It's bad enough that if Shaq assaults you it's a no call but if you get within three feet of Kobe it's a reach-in. And it's bad enough that Kobe, Phil Jackson and Shaq have the power to convince a referee to flip-flop on his calls. But when DEVEAN FUCKING GEORGE CAN GET A REF TO CHANGE HIS CALL, that's when it's time to call it quits. I was afraid that if I kept watching, Slava Medvedenko might ass-rape Hedo Turkoglu, only to have it be a foul on Turkoglu. He is from Turkey, after all.

I'm quickly becoming totally obsessed with my fish tank. I already want to increase my filtration and water movement levels by buying a Powerhead 402 and an Optima Air Pump. Yeah, this is my computer talk now!! Take your geek talk and your Wil Wheaton and your tech jokes (There are only 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't) and shove it!! BOOYAH!

15 May 2004

Check out this madness, this crazy roster:

Jose Theodore, JS Giguere, Marty Turco

Bryan McCabe, Sheldon Souray
Jay Bouwmeester, Adrian Aucoin
Brad Stuart, Chris Phillips
Scott Hannan, Steve Staios

Alex Tanguay, Vincent Lecavalier, Glen Murray
Todd Bertuzzi, Brendan Morrison, Paul Kariya
Scott Walker, Keith Primeau, Steve Sullivan
Brendan Shanahan, Daniel Briere, Rick Nash

What a crazy team, huh? You know who these guys are? These guys were the guys named to Canada's theoretical "B" Team for the World Cup of Hockey!! Why aren't we fielding two teams?

14 May 2004

I've never seen Kenny Ploen and Dieter Brock play, so they don't count. And Danny Mac did cock-all while he was with the Bombers. This puts Khari against Matty, TJ Rubley, Troy Kopp, Kevin McDougal, Kerwin Bell, Kent Austin, Sammy Garza, Tom Clements and Sean Salisbury. And he's better than all but one. Remember, he's done everything Dunigan's done for us, too. Matty never won us a title either.

Anyway, Nex, I'm in the process of picking up NFL Sunday Ticket. You should come by for a couple of beers when the season starts.

I just picked up a new toy for the apartment: a 50 gallon fish tank. I'm going to be collecting African Cichlids. I'll toss some pictures of some sweet Cichlids I've seen online so you can get an idea of what I want for my tank. Shitty thing is, that's all I can have in there, because the pH level has to be so high for them, it would kill any other fish I'd put in there.

What do y'all think of the new setup? Simple, but different, I guess. Change is always good.

I've been super lazy to do any reviews for Movie-Vault.com lately. This is the second straight set of days off where I didn't write a review. It's probably because it's summer now, or was until we got that retarded snowfall this week. WTF!?! Why is it that EVERY year since I bought those stupid rollerblades that less than 48 hours after the first time I pull them out it friggin snows? Next year, I'm pulling those assholes out in January.

11 May 2004

Khari would not be just behind matty as the greatest bomber QB of all time.......ever here of a couple guys named Ploen, Clemens, Brock, Garza,and even Danny Mac ?

ok garza is going a bit far I will admit that... putting anyone above Sammy is going to far Khari will jump ahead of a few of the names but will be a best third on the all-time greats list when he finally can lead a stacked team to the promised land and not bunk out when it counts.

on a guick side note "the National Post Charity Banjo Bowl, vs. the Saskatchewan Roughriders, Sept. 12 @ 1:00 p.m." What the hell is this about how far is Westwoods banjo comment going to go??

Sorry I haven't clicked into here in a while... moving, work, movie-vault.com reviews and general laziness are the main causes. Anyway, let's get going here, I don't have a lot of time. Well, I do, I just need to get back to looking at amateur porn and listening to BSB. I went on a Backstreet downloading binge today, grabbing like 25 songs. Whatever happened to the late-90s era of bubblegum pop? I miss happy songs. Songs that just made you smile, like Chico El Debarge's "Rhythm of the Night". Whatever happened to the days when you had to imagine a slutty Britney Spears hidden under that schoolgirl's uniform, instead of being slapped in the face with the one pulling lezbo with like a 50 year-old? Or the days when the words "Justin Timberlake" didn't immediately trigger horrible visions of Janet's sagging, lopsided, nipple-jewel encrusted boob? Or the days when the words "Janet Jackson" didn't immediately trigger horrible visions of her sagging, lopsided, nipple-jewel encrusted boob? Frankly, I was happy to picture Janet naked, before I found out her titties could double as Mizuno volleyball kneepads.

Wow, late April's a little early for the Khari bashing, dontcha think? I don't know about you, but I put Khari behind only Matty as the best Bomber quarterback in my lifetime. You give anyone, Dickenson, Ray, Cavillo that O-Line and those receivers outside of Stegall and see if they can throw for 4000 yards and 30 tds. Kamau Peterson was a sweet pickup, but I think the Toronto trade will be clutch. Cory Annett gives us a centre, and Randy Bowles is a better blocking back than Mike Sellers. Remember, the last time we traded Toronto for an offensive lineman, we got some guy named Dave Mudge.

Okay, I'm out, but I will be back tomorrow: look for an all-new review at Movie-Vault, and some changes to this place. Nothing major, just whatever, I'm getting bored.